Tower Topics ~ Summer 2002

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Healthy celibacy:
seeking answers to important questions

The past six months have been painful for the Catholic Church. And the students, faculty and staff of Conception Seminary College certainly have shared in the confusion, discouragement and anger felt by Catholics throughout the United States.

The reports of sexual abuse by priests, the poor judgment of some Church leaders, and the intense media coverage of more and more allegations have been especially challenging for our seminarians. They have had to re-examine their motivation and ideals very closely.

It is with concern for their welfare, and with respect for you, our alumni and friends, that I write.

The crime of sexual abuse is a crime no matter if it happened 30 years ago or yesterday. Priests have made mistakes in living their commitments and it is right to hold them to a high standard. At all costs we must protect children and others who are vulnerable. Bishops and religious superiors have made mistakes in not recognizing the serious harm an unhealthy priest can cause to others. The Church must acknowledge these mistakes and correct them.

Among the many questions raised by these incidents, there are two that are especially important for those of us who work in seminary formation. The first is whether there is something in the way priesthood is lived today – whether that be stress, loneliness or celibacy – that makes such dysfunctional behavior more likely to occur.

The second question is whether current formation programs help seminarians develop healthy attitudes and patterns of life. Are we giving these young men the tools to be good, holy and chaste men?

There is room in both areas for improvement by leaders and institutions within the Church – including Conception Seminary College. But I also contend that there is evidence of much improvement and success in the past 20 years.

There are strong opinions, both in society and within the Church, as to whether the priestly way of life is healthy. Many people believe the celibacy requirement leads to unhealthy priests. Somehow, it is thought, if priests could marry, sexual problems among their ranks would lessen. That assumption is simplistic, it seems to me, as married people often experience sexual problems as well – including pedophilia.

Of course, there is stress and loneliness in the priesthood. Some would say that explains sexual problems among priests. But stress and loneliness are present in all vocations where there is a great deal of responsibility and expectation. The vast majority of people – including priests – handle stress and loneliness without abusing others or psychologically harming themselves.

This brings us to the next question: How well do formation programs prepare future priests for the demands of their vocation? I assure you, this question weighs heavily on those of us who work in formation. But helping a young person acquire healthy attitudes and ways of living is a tremendous challenge in any situation, and more an art than a science. The best teacher or the best program, even the most loving parent, can still fall short in some instances.

What is important is that those of us responsible are genuinely concerned for the good of those who look to us for direction – as well as for those they will later serve – and that we continually seek better ways to communicate and model healthy living. Good formation in healthy celibate living involves not only sound information and advice, but also accountability for behavior. Behavior is where attitudes and values are ultimately expressed.

In the past decade, Conception Seminary College has completely rewritten its admission policies and developed an extensive curriculum of sexuality education. Each seminarian that crosses our threshold has been subject to an extensive evaluation by a licensed clinical psychologist. This evaluation addresses the potential seminarian’s personality traits, social views, and his capacity to work under tension and to establish and maintain healthy relationships. And, of special importance in light of recent events, it evaluates the young man’s sexual maturity and development of healthy sexual attitudes.

Seminarians are required to attend an annual Celibacy Workshop, conducted by outside experts. We offer a celibacy course that focuses on the psychological, historical, theological and spiritual aspects of celibacy, and an annual addiction workshop conducted by a visiting addiction specialist. A seminarian’s personal formation is addressed on a one-on-one basis in regular sessions with a formation director and a spiritual director, and our Wellness Program helps him strike a balance between physical, mental and spiritual health. In addition — and most important —there is the day-to-day life in a seminary community, in which each seminarian is challenged to show by his actions how well he has matured in personal character and virtue.

We have taken great strides to ensure that each student has ample resources to help him acquire the proper tools to live as a healthy, mature man. But we humbly realize that there is always room for improvement.

We are committed to training our seminarians to become pro-active in the work of child protection. We want to educate them to recognize signs of abuse and take responsibility to help the victims. It is not enough that our priests are not abusers themselves, they must also be knowledgeable advocates who take action against abuse.

I assure you that there are in fact many fine men in the seminary. I occasionally read or hear in the media outrageous caricatures of modern seminarians. I don’t know where these notions come from – certainly not from acquaintance with today’s seminarians. I am very impressed by the men who have been coming forth to test their vocation at Conception in the last several years. They are good, wholesome, generous, interesting men. The vast majority of them will make excellent priests or lay leaders in the Church.

Seminary is a learning environment, and that goes for administrators and members of our faculty and staff as well as for our students. Together we are learning from the past and working hard to ensure that each generation of priests is well equipped for the priestly life it will encounter.

As I told our seminarians, the gift of celibacy is not an impossible charism to live, unless you try to live it without God’s grace. We have many great examples, both among the saints and among priests we know, of dedicated men who learned how to live generous, loving and chaste lives of wonderful priestly ministry. We also have one great model in Jesus Christ who lost nothing of his rich humanity or of his ability to love when he embraced celibacy for the sake of the Gospel.

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